While T is in Barbados sunning himself with his soon to be child bride, I've been running the show and thought I was doing well. That is until I sent a peppy well done note/work more closely your new colleague note better to the entire team instead of our TA.
It was R who broke the news to me. First I thought she was joking and then as I hit my sent box, the colour drained from my cheeks (which is no easy task when you're a sista!). A recall message moment failed miserably, so I apologised to both of the ladies the email was directed at, then ranted for a bit.
Until J pipped up and told me in no uncertain terms to
"Get over it. It was a mistake That's what you'd say to me, if I'd done it".
She was of course spot on and I ended my hysterics like a child who had just been sent to the naughty step.
I managed to avoid making any further mistakes for the rest of the day. Gave FF the kiss off, and VA the green light - why is changing gyms always so traumatic? I was distracted by a text from B
B and I met up at the weekend for a latte and a dose of BB dating advice - I'm great at dishing it out, crap at taking it!
I told her to play it cool with the of her affections and that included staying mellow at the weekly after hours department drink.
I thought she'd listened until this little gem on my phone
"Umm I apparently told anyone exactly what I wanted to do to him in explicit detail"
"OMG!" I bounced back "Well at least I don't have to tell him for you. Don't freak out and just talk to him like normal. It will all blow over!".
"I resigned" she replied. It wasn't accepted by her boss thank goodness !
I laughed my socks off, as she told me everything.
"Don't be so hard on yourself babe. We've all done it. Lust makes you crazy and love dries you nuts"
"Ain't that the truth!"
Wednesday, 15 September 2010
Wednesday, 8 September 2010
Tough Day !
If you think you've got it tough with your boss and as you all know I've been there (HWMBO rooting through my desk to find something incriminating to tell me off about the next day remains a landmark in my former PA career!); then spare a thought for R. While wrestling a terminally jammed photocopier, her boss asked her to come and see him.
"I'm just sorting out the printer" she replied chirpily.
"Don't worry" he said I'll come to you" and in the blink of an eye he was beside her at the photocopier, complete with his laptop ready to resolve his query.
I've heard of multi-tasking, but that is taking things to a whole new level. We laughed as we wondered what would have happened if she said she was off to the loo. Would he have followed her laptop in hand !
Back at our bank of desk Ms Thang, who has been surprisingly quiet of late pipped up with a complete faux pas, which which all of our jaws drop.
As you all know not only am I fabulous, I am also a diva who loves to eat. I am happy to say despite my love of food, I have remained, due to some pretty hardcore sessions at the gym in good shape, but this wasn't always the case.
At school I was one of the fat kids for a couple of terms. Before I discovered exercise,I discovered the ultimate quick fix - throwing up.
It wasn't a full on addiction like it is for so many other woman, it was just something I like to pull out (pardon the pun! once in a while when I was feeling like a beached whale.
After Ms Thang innocently mentioned that she had made a biscuit last for three days (totally weird in my my book and for me a physical impossibility!) I couldn't resist making a quip.
"Next you'll be telling is that you got rid of it via the finger down the throat exit".
"Actually" she said straight faced " I used to do that" .
Wow. If that's what she did after eating a cookie that lasted for three days, what the hell did she do after a proper meal ?
"I hope you still don't do that. Because you know it really isn't healthy or cool " I fired back.
"No" she said measuredly enough not to be totally convincing.
Who said being beautiful was easy ?
"I'm just sorting out the printer" she replied chirpily.
"Don't worry" he said I'll come to you" and in the blink of an eye he was beside her at the photocopier, complete with his laptop ready to resolve his query.
I've heard of multi-tasking, but that is taking things to a whole new level. We laughed as we wondered what would have happened if she said she was off to the loo. Would he have followed her laptop in hand !
Back at our bank of desk Ms Thang, who has been surprisingly quiet of late pipped up with a complete faux pas, which which all of our jaws drop.
As you all know not only am I fabulous, I am also a diva who loves to eat. I am happy to say despite my love of food, I have remained, due to some pretty hardcore sessions at the gym in good shape, but this wasn't always the case.
At school I was one of the fat kids for a couple of terms. Before I discovered exercise,I discovered the ultimate quick fix - throwing up.
It wasn't a full on addiction like it is for so many other woman, it was just something I like to pull out (pardon the pun! once in a while when I was feeling like a beached whale.
After Ms Thang innocently mentioned that she had made a biscuit last for three days (totally weird in my my book and for me a physical impossibility!) I couldn't resist making a quip.
"Next you'll be telling is that you got rid of it via the finger down the throat exit".
"Actually" she said straight faced " I used to do that" .
Wow. If that's what she did after eating a cookie that lasted for three days, what the hell did she do after a proper meal ?
"I hope you still don't do that. Because you know it really isn't healthy or cool " I fired back.
"No" she said measuredly enough not to be totally convincing.
Who said being beautiful was easy ?
Monday, 6 September 2010
There's A Reason Why Men Have Balls
The great thing about being a serial dater is that you that are required to be brave - talking to strangers believe it or not is not a hobby of mine,but having run out of friends of friends, blind dates and wedding hook-ups, it has become a necessity.
It also makes you get real about what you are looking for. After all who wants invest their time and energy into the wrong person?
Unlike a lot of women online my profile is pretty neutral. I don't give a checklist of physical attributes and essential personality quirks, I just say I'm looking for the real deal, a man who is happy in his own skin, not a player and open to a relationship.
In the last two weeks, I have been viewed by 132 men. I have received 67 responses which would probably be flattering if it won't for the quality of the respondees!
I am blown away by the self delusion of some men who truly believe they are the real deal, even when they are most definitely not!
I have been contacted by old men, fat men, sexual freaks (one guy begged me to be his bitch and I could smack him whenever I liked! Ugh!), young bucks(18 is jailbait in my book) and the bitter divorcees - not just the domain of the female of the species !
While I may not appreciate the fish currently trying to swim in my pond, I do admire their balls. Unlike so many women who self sensor themselves, when connecting guys, these guys are so super confident and have a "who dares win" vibe going on that you can't help but admire their spirit.
Take yesterday, I spotted a mountain of joy called J whose witty profile, matched his picture and grabbed my attention.
It took me 20 mins to make up my mind to contact him. Then another 10 mins to come up with what I thought was a great hello email. His reponse was to view my profile, read my email and then go offline!
I concluded this was not a love match ! And moved on or I thought. I then spent 10 mins wondering whether my smartarse introduction was just a little too sassy and whether it was time to update my profile picture for the second time in the last two weeks, as dare I say it myself at the moment, I think I look pretty darned hot my profile picture!
One latte restored my balance and I had to laugh at the fact that my first response was to turn on myself and question both the physical and mental sides of me. I need to grow some bigger balls!
It also makes you get real about what you are looking for. After all who wants invest their time and energy into the wrong person?
Unlike a lot of women online my profile is pretty neutral. I don't give a checklist of physical attributes and essential personality quirks, I just say I'm looking for the real deal, a man who is happy in his own skin, not a player and open to a relationship.
In the last two weeks, I have been viewed by 132 men. I have received 67 responses which would probably be flattering if it won't for the quality of the respondees!
I am blown away by the self delusion of some men who truly believe they are the real deal, even when they are most definitely not!
I have been contacted by old men, fat men, sexual freaks (one guy begged me to be his bitch and I could smack him whenever I liked! Ugh!), young bucks(18 is jailbait in my book) and the bitter divorcees - not just the domain of the female of the species !
While I may not appreciate the fish currently trying to swim in my pond, I do admire their balls. Unlike so many women who self sensor themselves, when connecting guys, these guys are so super confident and have a "who dares win" vibe going on that you can't help but admire their spirit.
Take yesterday, I spotted a mountain of joy called J whose witty profile, matched his picture and grabbed my attention.
It took me 20 mins to make up my mind to contact him. Then another 10 mins to come up with what I thought was a great hello email. His reponse was to view my profile, read my email and then go offline!
I concluded this was not a love match ! And moved on or I thought. I then spent 10 mins wondering whether my smartarse introduction was just a little too sassy and whether it was time to update my profile picture for the second time in the last two weeks, as dare I say it myself at the moment, I think I look pretty darned hot my profile picture!
One latte restored my balance and I had to laugh at the fact that my first response was to turn on myself and question both the physical and mental sides of me. I need to grow some bigger balls!
Morning Glory
While my weekend may have been a quiet one, this week has already begun with several bangs.
I walked into the office in time to hear R recounting the tale of her not so magical road trip with the girls to Scotland. It ended on a ultimate low, when the 'tour guide' for the group evicted her own coach party at 3 am in the morning, for not being "more enthusastic" about her tour !
My favourite office crush DB is in the office, looking like a buttoned down Geography teacher, in a white shirt, Simon Cowell like jeans (why do some men not know where their waists are?) and a cotton Gap blazer, which should be all wrong, but makes him look totally gorgeous none the less.
Before you all throw your arms up in horror, don't worry I'm not regressing into my bad bitch ways. DB is strictly hands off eye candy.
As with every eligible guy I have met recently, he is of course completely unobtainable - being happily hooked up with a super hot girlfriend who has given him two super cute children
Also, because after Hottie, I learnt my lesson about peeing in my own backyard with someone who's already taken. Great for them. Rubbish for me and a completely uncool way to behave, by someone who's always banging on about wanting the real deal !
He is however so distracting that I am still recovering from our last department update which was done via video conference.
Despite the fact that he was wearing my favourite hot man uniform of a tight t-shirt and jeans, I surprised myself in being able, not only to string together multiple sentences during my business update, I also knew what the hell I was talking about - result!
I admit I enjoyed the guilty pleasure of staring at him for 90 minutes without him being able to see me, as I aimed the camera our end at S.
S, our IT guru has been sweetness and light today. The best mood he's been in, in about the last two weeks - he's now back to his normal self, which is basically a smiley smartarse. It's so good to have him back on form!
I walked into the office in time to hear R recounting the tale of her not so magical road trip with the girls to Scotland. It ended on a ultimate low, when the 'tour guide' for the group evicted her own coach party at 3 am in the morning, for not being "more enthusastic" about her tour !
My favourite office crush DB is in the office, looking like a buttoned down Geography teacher, in a white shirt, Simon Cowell like jeans (why do some men not know where their waists are?) and a cotton Gap blazer, which should be all wrong, but makes him look totally gorgeous none the less.
Before you all throw your arms up in horror, don't worry I'm not regressing into my bad bitch ways. DB is strictly hands off eye candy.
As with every eligible guy I have met recently, he is of course completely unobtainable - being happily hooked up with a super hot girlfriend who has given him two super cute children
Also, because after Hottie, I learnt my lesson about peeing in my own backyard with someone who's already taken. Great for them. Rubbish for me and a completely uncool way to behave, by someone who's always banging on about wanting the real deal !
He is however so distracting that I am still recovering from our last department update which was done via video conference.
Despite the fact that he was wearing my favourite hot man uniform of a tight t-shirt and jeans, I surprised myself in being able, not only to string together multiple sentences during my business update, I also knew what the hell I was talking about - result!
I admit I enjoyed the guilty pleasure of staring at him for 90 minutes without him being able to see me, as I aimed the camera our end at S.
S, our IT guru has been sweetness and light today. The best mood he's been in, in about the last two weeks - he's now back to his normal self, which is basically a smiley smartarse. It's so good to have him back on form!
Sunday, 29 August 2010
My Bank Holiday
My Bank Holiday's been a chilled one so far. Hung out in Brighton with friends. A welcome retreat from the Big Smoke. There's something so peaceful about getting about super early, walking along the beach and then just sitting out looking at the sea and just thinking.
Things are pretty darned good in my life at the moment. Friends and family great, work awesome and chilled out on love front also. In fact I arrived back home in time to sign off a potential love connection online - he is not ready for "a dating situation". I love that line from men. A very civil cop out from a complicated man.
By date two you should always know where you are. Whether you want to work out if things are going to lead anythere or not. Or maybe that's just me.
If I didn't know what I wanted romantically whatever my circumstance or even whether I could be bothered to try with someone, I wouldn't put myself in a position either via a dating website or actually just going out on date with someone. It doesn't really any make much sense and it would waste my time and of that of my date.
After all if you are simply looking for a booty call, which he ultimately said he was, it's an awful lot of effort to go to. At least he was upfront and I of course wished him well. The way I see it is if something doesn't work out, there's no point getting uptight about it. That's life.
After all there's nothing wrong with having a booty call buddy - so long as it's not me - I want a lot more from any man that I'm with. I know exactly what I want and whereas in the past I maybe I wouldn't have spoken out upfront, now I do and it rocks to have the balls to do that.
Things are pretty darned good in my life at the moment. Friends and family great, work awesome and chilled out on love front also. In fact I arrived back home in time to sign off a potential love connection online - he is not ready for "a dating situation". I love that line from men. A very civil cop out from a complicated man.
By date two you should always know where you are. Whether you want to work out if things are going to lead anythere or not. Or maybe that's just me.
If I didn't know what I wanted romantically whatever my circumstance or even whether I could be bothered to try with someone, I wouldn't put myself in a position either via a dating website or actually just going out on date with someone. It doesn't really any make much sense and it would waste my time and of that of my date.
After all if you are simply looking for a booty call, which he ultimately said he was, it's an awful lot of effort to go to. At least he was upfront and I of course wished him well. The way I see it is if something doesn't work out, there's no point getting uptight about it. That's life.
After all there's nothing wrong with having a booty call buddy - so long as it's not me - I want a lot more from any man that I'm with. I know exactly what I want and whereas in the past I maybe I wouldn't have spoken out upfront, now I do and it rocks to have the balls to do that.
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