I've been offline for the last few days, as I have been at a motivational team building event or so I thought. My first day was filled with the back-to-back presentations and general go team back-slapping you always expect at these type of events.
The next half day was spent doing more of the same, with me still smarting from JA's (if you need to know what the initials stand for - please let me know, I will be only too happy to tell you!) cutting comments clearly directed at me.
I hasten to add, I ran the whole conference last year with a team of one (not a novice team of 4 plus an events company!) and trust me that conferece was the business!
M and I were looking forward to sitting on the train and just for once, going home at a reasonable time until, yes you've guessed it, a timely voice message from HWMBO requesting our immediate return to the office, to "clean up a few things" before the weekend, turned happish Friday into shit Friday in a matter of seconds as anything to do with him, is never simple.
As we walked to the office, I noticed a group of about ten secondary schoolboys in a semi-circle. As we drew closer, I noticed two of them were fighting. I don't know what possessed me, but I ploughed straight in the thick of things"Oi you two stop it!" I shrieked sounding like an EastEnders extra.
I must have looked pretty scary or just pissed off and I was also carrying a baseball bat (a prop from our Sporting Heroes themed fancy dress party the night before) because the boys instantly stopped fighting each other. I told one to "..Do one!" and the other one to "Walk away", before I got really ticked off and then proceeded to give the remaining boys a very graphic telling off, which including parental gems like how 'disappointed' I was in their behaviour and how 'behaving like thugs just ain't cool !"
M told me I had made him laugh when I'd 'kicked off', but he knew I could handle things, and we hurriedly tapped away on our keyboards, pulling together the stuff HWMBO had asked for, until M had to leave.
Hammering through my final update of the day with HWMBO, I realised I had just got my groove back. If I can handle a rowdy group of boys , without turning a hair and keep them in check, why the hell am I so bothered about HWMBO and keeping him sweet? I so want to get things right with him. Make him happy and God knows I try my best every single blooming day.
I've spent so much time over the last six months wrapped up in trying to keep everyone happy (mostly HWMBO), being seen to do the right things, team playing like my life depended on it; until my own ambitions, needs and hey just every day joy have been anniliated. Some days I have wondered what is the actual point of continuing to chase my tail leading such a soulless existence.
Well sod it, from today it's all about me and in keeping with our motivational guest speaker - this diva is Taming her Lions,Tigers and Bears and taking no prisoners!
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