Karma's A Bitch

The search for Mr Right Now continues at snail's pace. Sticking to my resolve to get out and about in the past two weeks, I have been to two birthday parties and one leaving do. At each event, I have been surrounded by a reservoir of couples, beautiful people (alien variety media and model types) and hit and runs - "I just popped in for a quick one".

At each event I've felt like a decorative spare part. I have been talkative (when aren't I?). Inquistive (or nosey depending on your point of view!) but have always found myself at some stage of the evening saddled with the apparently only other single person there. By the end of the conversation with my fellow singleton, I realise why they are single and why we are completely incompatible with each other.

Back home, a quick check on my online profile tells me that so far Pablo (aka PuffBall) Leonard (cuddly!), Jason (fat and balding), Ronnie (looking for at 18 -39 mate, currently separated but looking for some special female company) and Steve 123 ("Are you looking for a submissive partner accompanied by a weird staring eyed picture!), have left me with the distinct impression that my profile, picture or both are sending out a special message that only unattractive men can answer to.

Even looking at the who's viewed me button on my profile, made my heart sink. More unsexy men ! I have absolutely nothing against non adonis men, but I do dislike their double standards and delusions of handsomeness. While we women are expected to look our best at all times and at all ages, it would seem that some men think the same rules don't apply to them.

"What's wrong with me?" I wailed to G, following a painful trip to the cinema (Wolverine, is without a doubt the worst movie of all time - even Hugh Jackman in a tight white, indestructable vest, which never got dirty or torn, even after luscious Hugh took on the mother of all villians, couldn't save this plotless mess).

G who's currently loved up with lightswitch boy (he regularly rotates between normal and super insecure usually several times a week) shined the cold light reality straight between my eyes. "Look at it from another perspective, you're giving them the same response as the guys you say can't be bothered to reply to you". "Trust me darling either take up being a full-time chubby chaser or there's always the adult site". "Smug cow!" I said smirking and quietly vowing to update my profile.