Thursday, 18 June 2009

The Waiting Game

I am beginning to think that I am cursed when it comes to men. For the past three days I have been talking to S. S has passed the basic training that I now put all would-be suitors through. He has first made contact via email. next, he sent an above average introductory message, which was suitably cheeky and funny enough, to grab my attention.

We exchanged a few more emails and then he asked whether we could ditch the typing frenzies and have a chat on the phone and so he gave me his number. "Sure" I said " I'll call you 8ish". At 8.20 I called. Voicemail. I called again 15 mins afterwards and once again it was the voicemail.

The funny thing is that it didn't phase me at all. I totally expected it. I am so used to men doing absolutely anything other than what I want them to do. Even the most basic expectation I have of them from showing up for a date, making a decision about where we going, voluntarily telling me that they already have a girlfriend, wife or side order of booty call ever ready.

Fortunately, previous experience has taught me to not take things to heart and that disappointments often turn out to be omens of future disasters or just lucky escapes. S finally daned to text me at 9:30 to tell me he was sorry to have missed my call but he was out "...having a curry", but hoped I was having a good evening and would call me tomorrow, without specifying a time.

When a man's need for a curry is more important than him being bothered to call you, you can either a)turn to your own piece of heaven - ice cream or chocolate or b) take counsel from your males friends.

"It's a bit rude" said M "He hasn't even met you yet and he can't be bothered to take your call or text you before you call him to say he's doing something. What do you say in your text back to him?"

"I told him I was having a nice evening, when in fact what I really wanted to say is that my first impression of you is that you are rude nob".

M laughed. "If he calls you then fair enough, but don't expect anything from him. He just doesn't seem that bothered about it"

N summed the nature of the beast in his own unique way. "I don't mean to be crude, but men are like predators and if they want to eat, they are going to hunt and work to get hold of their prey. Just leave this one alone, he's not interested". "Also remember next time, just one phone call, it shows you made the effort, but you aren't too fussed whether you hear from him again or not".

And I thought I was the expert !

Postscript - It is now 24 hours since S said he would call...yes you've guessed it....he still hasn't ! Clearly the curry whoever 'she' was is still keeping him occupied !

1 comment:

Andreas said...

Online dating has different rules to face-to-face dating. People are more relaxed about it, don't feel obliged to commit to anything straight away. Don't be too keen to move to the phone stage to quickly either.