Sunday, 10 July 2011

Last Chance Saloon

Sometimes to get what you want you have to go right to the top. On Friday I found myself face to face with the BB aka the one man who can extend my contract.

I found another in. Not my present role but something with a bigger scope long-term and more importantly something I can do really well. I pulled together a business justification document and managed to get into to see the man.

10 minutes later it was all over and I was left wondering whether I'd either saved myself or blown it. Tomorrow I may or may not find out. I've got everything crossed.

Dinner with A was just what I needed, even though she straight up called me out. After all of my promises about work not owning me, particularly after my experience with HWMBO, what's happening proves how important work is to me.

I've worked late for the last three weeks. Pitches, job applications, ideas anything to make sure I'm employed. The latest I've worked til at work is 1am, which wasn't a big deal, it was just necessary.

A reminded me that I've forgotten about me. I've turned down dates, hanging out with friends anything that distracts me from work.

Work has saved me many a time from dealing with all kinds of crap - a my insecurities (come on we all have them), broken hearts, boredom, occasional loneliness you name it - work has always been the one constant in my life. I can control that doesn't let me down.

Until now...and that's what's freaking me out.

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