Saturday, 30 January 2010

Ok Enough About Me...for Today Anyway!

So because the world clearly doesn't just revolve around me (despite my delusions of superior importance!)and I am not the only person in the world job hunting at the moment, I have to tell you about how N's interview went this week.

N is Italian, funny, quirky, feisty, highly intelligent and rather annoyingly gorgeous. She manages to look great in everything she wears and as is essential for anyone whose a friend of mine has strong opinions, about everything!

Did I also mention that she is a super talented journalist and it is for this talent, she found herself being interviewed for a role with petrochemical giant. All sounds pretty ordinary right, until the actual interview began.

First her interviewer asked her to interview him and then he asked the following:

"Can you tell me who's the current American secretary of state"?

For my American readers, I know it's Hillary Clinton, but remember N is Italian, was hungover and hadn't had much sleep, so N replied.

"Could I get another question?"

"They are not going to get any easier. You said in your CV that you read the Financial Times every day. So please tell me who is the Egyptian president?'' For the record, does anyone out there know who the present Egyptian president is?

At this point, N hit the humour trail, adopted by divas eveywhere when faced with situations for which there is no instant answer...

"Can I call a friend for a suggestion?" (smart arse comment, worthy of moi!)

"But this is not a TV show?"

"Aright, can we go back to me asking questions then?"

"This is not what I had in mind"

"Think I have humiliated myself enough though."

"Ok then, ask me a question"

"Don't you think it's more important to have skills than being an encyclopaedia?"

"Say you have to interview the CEO for this huge media company but his PA was unco-operative, says he's always busy - what would you do?"

"I send him a video or I stalk him at work"

"Ok that's good and if that didn't work?"

"I go out with all his friends, talk to them and eventually force him to speak to me"

"Ok good. A personal question for you now" (and this is where things really got kooky!)

"How is your health? Why are you so slim?" (I've known N for a few years now and she has always been blessed with body of a supermodel and the appetite of a builder - the cow!). Her response, having missed breakfast was to reach for a biscuit!

"Is this to show me you are not anorexic? Anyway, I am judging you for your charm and appearance, don't get me wrong, those are really good."

"I am not anorexic at all" (At this point N's restraint must be commended!)

"Boyfriend?" (What does that have to do with any interview you've ever been too?)


"Would you like to say something else?"

"Yes. I know you have mixed feelings about me in this moment but don't worry ... even my mother does". (Something every woman should know!)

"Why are you not scared of me? Normally people are, I always try to make small talk at the start..Maybe I should try to smile more.What do you think of this interview?" (Not all English men are hit with Hugh Grant slickness!)

"I don't think I can offer you the counselling you so clearly need, but in a masochist way I have enjoyed it", replied N.

After listening to N's story, I realise I've got off easy ! I've never had an interview quite that weird!

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