Happy New Year

Hooray, I've made it! It's the end of 2010 and this diva is still standing !

Things I've learnt this year:

Remember to be grateful - I have literally landed on my feet the whole of this year, particularly when my back has been against the wall.

To take no prisoners - in my life and at work - I deserve the very best iand I don't have to put up with bad situations.

Not to run away from tough shit - life is great, but sometimes its not. How you deal with the tough times is what truly counts.

I am good at stuff - laughing, shopping, bad karaoke, giving advice (general and dating!) and I'm a certified fashionista.

Things I am going to do this year:

Step up on my writing - do more of it!

Spend more time with my family and friends.

Take up more freelance work - not just writing, I source materials for house refurbishments.

Make more me time - to do my photography, go to dance classes, rock climbing and definitely some more fencing and before I forget find a new love interest !!

Remember to enjoy life, because it sure ain't a rehearsal.

Thanks for continuing to read me and I hope you have a brilliant 2011 - May all your dreams come true !

Love BB

-x-

Christmas Is Over !

It's official my trying to love Christmas amnesty is over. It was ended by the pickpocket who helped themselves to my purse this afternoon, while I was out at the sales

I realised just how crap a memory I had when I tried to remember just how many cards I had in it (come on can you remember what you have in your purse or wallet, when you haven't got it right in front of you?), whether my membership card for the National Portrait Gallery is still valid and then regretted not having another copy of the picture of me and G,which was nestled in it clear insert.

I went back to all the shops I'd been to in the vain hope that someone would have handed my discarded purse in, but my pleas were met with stony indifference, only one assistant suggested I leave my number just in case and said she hoped my purse would turn up.

Back home a last minute desperate rifle through my bag, confirmed what I already knew and I called the bank.

I was pleasantly surprised to be connected to a human being (not a call centre in India!), who cancelled all my cards and gently reminded me that I'd got off lightly, aside from a little inconvenience I was not hurt and no money had been taken from any of my accounts -I was lucky.

She was right.I am, but the fact remains it gave me a wake up call not to stress out on the small stuff which I always do(after all nobody died, I just had a dodgy incovenient panic hour)and to be more alert to my surroundings and the people in them.

Lesson learned !

Friends Reunited !

If there's one thing you need after overloading on 'family' after Christmas. it's time with your friends.

M is back in 'Blighty for her annual Christmas break, leaving the Big Apple behind and luckily for her arriving just in time to miss our own snowbound airport chaos.

We caught up today for lunch at Selfridges, having managed to navigate our way past sale crazed bargain hunters, making up for being denied their Boxing Day fix curtesy of a national rail strike yesterday.

You wouldn't believe we haven't seen each other for three years. The banter was the same, our serious moments were just the right side of grown up - short and sweet but not too depressing.

Best of all though was the fact that we still share the same way of looking at things (men aside...my taste is marginally better!) in our lives and for that I am truly thankful.

I didn't hesitate inviting her to come along and have dinner with LL and I at a cheeky little Thai place in Shoreditch. LL duly arrived suitcase in hand, fresh from the 'Orphans Christmas' at N's, looking amazing in a Ruskie hat I would have died for.

Oh how I wish I had joined them, particularly when I heard they spent Christmas eating, drinking and best of all watching back to back episodes of The Tudors, featuring the very truly beautiful Jonathan Rhys Myers and the even hotter Henry Cavill.

LL was on tip-top form, full of stories, wise cracks and her usual wiry wisdom. She and M got on like a house and fire and hanging out with them both during a fun-filled evening made me thank heaven for good friends.

The Only Way Is Up

When a woman splits up with her man, she can always rely on her girlfriends to pull her through. However, when your ex rubs you nose in you splitting up, in the press and on national tv repeatedly, there's only one place to go to vent instantly - Twitter!

Last night's The Only Way Is Essex was a classic Twitter source, just begging for instant comment. Leading man M has been in a love triangle with his ex L1,who constantly tells anyone who'll listen to her, that they were 'together for nine years', almost like it's her Blue Peter girlfriend badge of martyrdoom.

New girl on the block L2, who sort of replaced L1 (Although M continued seeing L1 on the side!)and let's not forget, cheeky outsider S, who put the cat among the pigeons last night by confessing to be 'sorta seeing' M too.

In fact M and S ended the night in a black cab (Eastenders stylie!)heading off to the well renowned Essex nightspot Faces.

I'll admit I was glued to this hour long bitch fest, full of comings and goings and demonstrating the sheer stupidity of all the ladies concerned, allowing themselves be played by someone who is already completely in love - with himself!

I knew that fans of the show, wouldn't be able to resist a good old venting session on Twitter today and they didn't let me down. M and L kicked things off.

M moaned "Not having a public row pathetic on xmas, but just 2 say im SINGLE and have been for 9months, was seeing lucy in between, so how can any harm be done?"

Then L (that's L1, not L2!) hit back "U serious! You low life scum! How dare u even make this 100 times worst for yourself, get on with it u nasty evil person!!"

Then it was open house, as everyone (all pro L1 not L2!) piled in with their opinions on the situation.

"M needs to give himself a good scrub down and stop sleeping about! Man whore! It's not attractive! Lauren - stay clear!"

"I don't blame u hun u deserve so much better ur beautiful and won't have a problem finding someone nicer, have a fab xmas"

" M tried to make you look stupid but he came out of it lookin the bigggest fool ! chin up - keep smiling x"

All of these comments were from nice sensible people, trying to give honest and sincere feedback, but they missed the point. They proved there is such a thing as oversharing!

If you are going to open up your personal life to the world, then be prepared to be judged, sometimes harshly. I should know! How you deal with it, is what shows what type of character you are.

Looking at the Twitter traffic, M's ended the day branded as a 'love rat', while L1 has got so much Twitter sympathy, it may just give her enough of a boost, to realise that she is responsible for how she is perceived and treated by men, particularly the oh so charming M.

If you accept bad behaviour in your relationships, that's all you'll ever get and then some of the blame has to be laid squarely on your shoulders. You can't just blame the other person.

A Ok

Apart from all the stuff I've been through this year, I've watched lots of changes in the lives of my friends too.

The latest news was from A who has just landed an ace new job, which finally takes him to a role and industry, where he will have the opportunity to do amazing things.

I've watched him over the last few years, find love with an amazing person, give the very best advice and loyally support his friends, be a sweetheart(but don't get me wrong, he can still bitch with the best of us!)be a rock for me and end up exactly where he should be - which is super happy.

We're having lunch tomorrow and I can't wait to see him !

Wrapping Up Work !

I'm trying desperately to kick-start my Christmas spirit, but trying to do that while you're still at work is another thing entirely.

The day began badly when J who dragged her sick Lemsip fuelled body into work, was promptly sent back home by S. She felt so rubbish, she didn't even want to hug the year out, for fear of inflicting her germ warfare on the rest of us.

S and I quietly worked through our morning tasks before she dropped the bomb ! that our Colombian princess - Ms Thang is leaving our glamorous advertising bubble for a photocopier company !!!

Maybe it was the unguarded shots I managed to snag of her at the Christmas party, which showed the cheeky side we always knew she was hiding, but that only seems to appear when she isn't worrying about her boyfriend and checking in with him at regular intervals.

I suspect that her all controlling other half, may have had a little something to do with this sudden career change, as rather too conveniently her new workplace is super close to their home; giving her even more time to chase around after him.

Poor cow ! It will be interesting to see who replaces her, after all they will have a table full of people whose personalities they will have to mesh with.....I already sense impending hours of fun breaking in the newbie !

JO has been replaced (but is most definitely not forgotten by us!) by amiable, but throughly dull young man. He appears completely competent, but has all the charisma of a damp Catherine Wheel. Hopefully, we'll see a spark of personality from him in the New Year!

B, O and I managed to package up the last of the overseas Christmas presents (part of our company charity drive) and get them couriered to the Salvation Army home in Africa we are sponsoring.

The good vibe continued when we managed to catch out S, who always takes care of everyone else's birthdays, with a little birthday celebration of her own.

A jam-packed finish to my year at work !

Snow Sucks !

For the second time in as many weeks, my weekend plans have been disrupted by the crappy weather. Six inches of snow in about 20 minutes, one text from LL

"Errr, I'm sorry but I'm too hung over for Santa at 11:30. Not feeling good at all. Can I cancel without you hating me? x", and suddenly my morning was clear.

I could have stayed indoors, but since I was up and that Soap and Glory super size tote bag offerwas calling out to me, I bit the bullet and went into town.

Its amazing how determined a woman can be in pursuit of a bargain. I snapped up 2 Soap and Glory bags, some groceries and the paper before heading home.

Snuggled up on my sofa, watching the snow I cast my mind back to this time last year, when I was under the thrall of DG who turned out to be a triple A Bolter.

I smiled as I thought how I would handle him now, which of course would be to bin him immediately.

What a difference a year makes !

The Best Christmas Party

After the impersonal superclub venue of last week's party, last night's tasteful venue in a classy London enclave was a well executed affair.

It was intimate enough to hold all of our team and its guests, a DJ, bar, entertainment and still had just enough dance room for everyone to comfortably throw their best bad arse dance shapes !

There's something about free food and drink, that causes those who are asked to 'dive in' to always over indulge in it.

There are of course consequences to this. Aside from the obvious canape overload, which generally leads you to stuff yourself just for the hell of it and if you happen to be wheat intolerant, bloat up like a blow fish, alcohol is a much more deceptive seducer, that divides its indulgees into distinct groups.

The first are the steady eddies. They know their favourite tipple, don't mix their drinks and move onto water as soon as they hit their limit.

Others however, push through with some decided dodgy outcomes.

One hot and happy couple have so far been sighted snogging at the annual offsite, last week's party, once again tonsil wrestled at our party, as soon as the alcohol hit their system.

I'm not sure what the they're waiting for, but I think on the evidence of last night, they should get a room and work things out!

Then you get the middle ground martha's. This group manage to hold their alcohol, or it seems like they can, until the end of the night. This is when their memories lapse and suddenly they found they've lost stuff.

Two gems were J who thought she lost her I-phone searched everywhere and then found it safely stashed in her cheeky thigh boots! T worked herself into a annoyed frenzy, when in her cab home she 'realised' she'd left her handbag in the club.

Several frantic phone calls later, the cab dropped off one of her fellow travellers, who oblivious to the panic, after a back of the cab snooze, handed over the 'missing' bag, over to T who had given to him for safekeeping.

The last group are the never know when to stop brigade. This special band take it to the max. Drink til they can't stand, lose the power of sensible speech or just want to hump the next person or pillar they come near.

Just like H who finding herself barely able to stand or speak, accepted the kind offer of a bed for the night from a colleague. In the middle of the night she got up and decided to go outside and get some fresh air, in her pjs.

Unfortunately, she managed to lock herself out. Instead of knocking on the door and waking up her host, she flagged down a cab and asked to be taken to the nearest police station, which is where she spent the rest of her night.

Realising that she was in no fit state to come into work, she left a sheepish voicemail for her boss, briefly explaining her status and asking that he spare her blushes, which of course with a story that funny he obviously didn't do.

Arrrr the joys of the Christmas party !!

Door To Our Future

As you all know I hate Christmas, but this year I've decided to change things up by working with the homeless at a hostel with LL and N. I am also attending the 'Orphans Christmas' at N's house.

The reason for my change of heart I've decided not to let the present and my future be coloured by some bad experiences in my past.

It's funny how I easily I can let go of my romantic hit and misses (apart from H, but I've mothballed all of that away now!), probably because I'm so used to picking myself up, after consigning the latest 'Mr Not Quite Right' to the unsuitable pile.

Also because through my friends and inevitably this blog, I work through all my dating joys (few, but precious!) frustrations, laughter and disappointments.

I can look back on things like my defunct friendship with G, with a smile. We had some really good times together...but I always knew that I if we ever stopped hanging out, I wouldn't really feel it that much.

I was always more self sufficient, together and less needy than her, which is probably why we got on so well together. And I've always valued my family and friends over my partners however, great our relationship was or is. You never know what's around the corner.

I don't even despise HWMBO anymore, in fact I should thank him. If he hadn't been so unpleasant, I'd still be there chasing my tail. Trying to cope with his impossible demands and making myself sick with worry and completely miserable in the process.

Yes, I've let it go, because after all the crap with him I've found a role that challenges me, that I'm good at and regularly praised for. I am good enough, which of course I always was.

I realise that all the blood and sweat I invested, in doing my degree at night school was worth every moment. First time around, I just wasn't ready for it and didn't see the value of having a decent education and the choices that possessing one would give me.

Most of all I realise that your future, which we always see so clearly at the end of each year, is yours and mine to to mould and realise as we want it to be.

It is what it is.

The Moody Pole

I'm recovering from a day spent with a super moody T.

T does amazing building work (my bathroom and living room both look fantastic), but he can also be a little precious and stubborn sometimes, when you ask him to do something he doesn't like; which is weird really considering he's agreed to do it and he is getting paid.

I simply asked him to replace some rotten wood in the frame of my front porch. He did that no problem, but also managed to knock out both porch panes of glass.

I persuaded him that a porch without glass was non-negotiable, particularly as he is leaving for Poland on Monday. He took the news grudgingly, first telling me he didn't know where he could buy glass from.

Not being a lady who likes to take no for an answer, I went online and found a shop close by. I also ran off a map to the shop, as his Polish sat nav, didn't (just like its owner) want to co-operate!

He sulked all the way, as we made our way to the shop. 35 mins later he had got us 'lost' 4 times. It was pretty good going by T, since the shop was only 10 minutes from BB Towers!

I didn't want to take the chance of him losing us for a 5th time, so I ended up calling the shop for directions. Once we'd arrived, picked up and loaded the glass onto his van, I heaved a large sigh of relief.

That was until we got half way home. One badly negotiated speed bump by the still grumpy T, meant that the next thing I heard the crack of one of the panes of glass shattering.

Bloody typical ! I was meant to be at Winter Wonderland with LL, not trying to pacify a moody Pole and buy another blooming pane of glass !

Mad Men and Office Sirens

There's nothing like the morning after the night before to sort the the weak from the strong after the office Christmas party. When I got into work today with my partner in crime from the night D, our office was almost deserted !

No surprise there. Everyone certainly went for it at the party. I don't think I have ever seen so many amazing looking men and women in one room.

The boys were all in sharp suits and skinny ties, while the ladies proved that late 50s - early 60s glamour is beyond chic.

The venue was overflowing with beehives, bell dresses, huge petticoats, cute bags, painted nails and pillarbox red lips.

With a free bar all night, you might have expected a roll call of naughtiness, but there wasn't any that I saw.

Maybe it was the mellow vibe on the night, or maybe it was just not wanting to deal with a hammer head in the morning and having to get up and go to work !

The Moon Has Eclipsed

There are two things I wanted for Christmas. One was a new unattached, smart, funny, emotionally secure, available man and the other was for my 'Moonlighting' couple to stop dancing around each other and sort themselves out.

As you all know I am still looking for number one (but hey, who knows what might happen tonight at Christmas party!) and unfortunately, as of last night number two is no longer a possibility.

C texted me with the bad news.

"Have just left Mr M in the arms of another woman. Cancel your best woman speech and don't buy that hat! He had a word with his friend who then 'distracted aka entertained ' me, while he closed the deal with her. I'm ok though"

How bloody typical of a man at the Christmas party, to be swayed by the office bombshell, instead of getting together with someone who will last a lot longer than one drunken night, I thought as I texted back.

"The man is a total fool! Not worthy of your lovely wonderful self -x-"

"Thanks BB. I'm feel just like you did over I, you know, ok with it. I left the party a little early, so he could do his thing. I'm more pissed off with his friend who I get along really well with and who knows the score between us, but still got involved"

"I am so glad I wasn't drinking. I just had a feeling, so I made a dignified exit. I've always had my doubts about him and I was right. It couldn't have been much worse, but I am a little hurt"

"No nice guy behaves like an arse in front of someone he knows likes him. His loss bigtime cherub. I feel your disappointment and you have every right to feel like this. Both he and his friend are idiots. But just remember you are leaving this nonsense behind for a new job and more sincere friends elsewhere. Better days and people await you", I replied.

A gentleman just like a woman has the pregative to change their minds. However, there are more grown up sensitive ways to, let someone down gently, than roping in a friend to keep your 'outgoing' love interest occupied, while you get busy with her replacement.

Nanny BB

I've been a little grumpy today...I know it seems almost unbelievable but even divas get the blues sometimes, and forget that everyone has to start somewhere and sweating over small stuff is a complete waste of time.

This week I have been charged with looking after our intern, which has gripped me with the overworthy desire to ensure he gets the most out of his time with us.

My need to be on time, super organised and in control (I even prepared his schedule myself) means I am slowly driving myself nuts, as personified by my morning of chaos.

I started the day by somehow ending up waiting twice as long for my bus to the train station, which meant I missed my connecting train, which meant I was half an hour late. I hate being late for anything, so I immediately felt like I was running behind for the day.

The first two 'meet and greets' flagged on the intern's schedule both cancelled and I was forced to scramble around the office looking for some other work to occupy him with.

Lunch couldn't come fast enough, but after lunch a communication from our big chief reminded me that I was once an intern sort of !

Our meeting tomorrow is a very important location to me. When I was studying, through the university, I managed to land a brilliant internship placement, working at a radio station and ended up writing and producing a show for them.

I remember being beyond scared, excited and proud when it finally aired. Which is probably what it feels like to be a 16 year old, plunged into the world of work, when you have little or no idea about what you want to do with the rest of your life.

I made a mental note to chill out and try and make things more fun for him and me !

BB the Matchmaker

While my love life seems condemned to the Land That Time (and dates!) Forgot, it doesn't stop me wanting to play matchmaker to those around me.

Ms Blonde and Ms Brunette have both confessed to having a soft spot for H. H is a tall, long haired 20 something hot rod who is incredibly (for our building) single!

In fact he's hot enough to make several of the ladies I work with, pray that something mechanical goes wrong, just so he can come upstairs and fix it!

H told me he was helping set up the party venue, so probably wouldn't want to stay for the party.

"But what about your two secret admirers - Ms Blonde and Ms Brunette?" I said teasing him.

"Why won't you just tell me who they are ?", he said grinning widely.

"My lips are sealed" I said, leaving H none the wiser.

"I think you should tell him" said F on the boat ride home. "That way he can go for the one he likes the best".

"Yes, but you know how silly guys can be. I think Ms Brunette is perfect for him, but you know he'll probably just follow his groin and go after Ms Blonde"

"Not necessarily" replied F sensibly. "He might go for Ms Brunette. Tell him who they are and see what happens".

What's a BB to do? Keep silent or stir things up ?

Snowed In and Introducing Little Ms Text Pest !

No I've not gone AWOL, I've been snowed in and my broadband crashed too! BB without contact with the outside world is a like a fashionista whose credit card just got cut up in front of her- deranged !

Fortunately, my phone still worked, which was handy as C phoned me on Saturday with her 'Moonlighting almost romance' update.

"I've done it again BB. I told everyone how much I fancied him and then I texted him to tell him that the only reason he was at the company party in Brighton, that I couldn't go to because of the snow, was so he could get off with JW !".

"So let me get this straight", I said laughing.

"You told the guy that you aren't actually dating, off for potentially trying it one with someone else, that he doesn't like?"

"That's right" she said.

We both laughed our socks off for about 5 minutes, only stopping because my sides ached and her eyes were streaming with tears. While she laughed at her own silliness, I was laughing about how crazy horse lust can make you do truly loopy things sometimes.

"Please tell me you didn't do anything else nuts after sending that crazy arse text to him?", I said, still laughing.

"Course I did! You know what a nutter I am after a few glasses of wine. I sent a few more texts"

"Oh no! How many more?", I said, waiting for her punchline response.

"15!" she said snorting with laughter, which made me laugh even more.

"Listen, it's done now cherub and if he's half the fun guy you say he is, he have laughed about those messages just as much as I'm doing now".

"I hope so", C replied doubtfully.

An hour later she called back. Mr M had texted back...

"I received several very funny texts from you yesterday. You do know I am going tease the hell out of you, when I see you on Monday !"

Game on! Who knows they might actually make it to that second date, before Christmas !!

The Letdown

I've always been one of those people who is happy to help out if I'm asked, particularly if I know my failure to act or complete a task will impact on the person who asked me for help.

Today I was mega disappointed to find a schedule co-ordination task I assigned to a few of my 'reliables' some of whom, had just read my email, ignored me face to face follow up and done absolutely nothing about my request.

Consequently, I found myself doing some hardcore apologising to a colleague who I regard as a mentor and whose support and understanding I value a lot. In short I looked like an incompetent tool.

To be told by one of those assigned that she was "really busy" and it "wasn't her job" really pissed me off, particularly because I've done a role like hers on numerous occasions over the years and compared to my curent one, I wipe the floor with her take on being busy.

Once I'd finished being pissed off, I did what I should have done originally, which was to make time to complete the task myself. It took me a day and a half of phone calls, favour pulling and some mild pleading to pull the schedule together, send it to my mentor and apologise again.

Fortunately, she was understanding and thanked me, but it goes without saying that tonight while I'm working late, to make up for the time I 'wasted' today, doing something I delegated two weeks ago, little Ms 'I'm too busy" is off getting very merry at one of our numerous Christmas parties.

I have no problem with that at all, but what did hack me off is that I've always bent over backwards to make sure she's ok and today she basically told me to get lost.

A mistake. Hers not mine, because as I always say, don't piss off someone if you don't need to. Life has a habit of biting you hard when you do the wrong thing.

I remembered something S said to me recently, with that wary raised eyebrow look she throws me sometimes.

"You need to leave behind your past. You aren't the same person and you most definitely aren't one of the girls anymore. Stop acting like one and stop protecting some people who wouldn't do the same for you".

Never a truer word said by you S and yes, yet another BB lesson learned !!

Lucky Me !

I spent the day snuggled up on my sofa watching old black and white movies. It was another one of my days off that I have to take or 'lose it" !

Watching the snow fall outside from my cosy spot, I was struck by how lucky I am to live in a nice house, have a fab job (that's been a long time coming, but was so worth the wait!), have a great family and amazing friends.

It just takes a minutes to be a little grateful and a lifetime to not do it enough!

Snow Angels, Dating Don'ts and The Longest Journey Home

I'll admit I'm just like a kid around snow. When I awoke this morning to find my garden and the streets surrounding my house, covered in a blanket of white, I couldn't wait to pull on some clothes and make snow angels.

Once I'd finished messing about, I set off to meet GD for lunch. GD was on top form. His new job is going great, he's lost weight and he was full of mischief. He spilled the beans on his latest dates and made me laugh.

Just like C (the female half of my 'Moonlighting' couple, and no, there is still no new update from my favourite almost lovebirds), he shook hands with one of his dates.

Forgive me but since when has shaking hands with anyone you fancy led to romance? Talk about passion killer! Nothing lays your intentions like a continental two cheek kiss! Remember that when you are out and about at your Christmas parties !

I thought my journey home would be quick despite the snow, but oh no.

I got to Victoria Station in time to find out that the rail network had ground to a halt because of the snow. One hour later we were told there would be no trains until further notice.

I caught the Tube to Wimbledon and then managed to slither my way onto the tram. When we got to my tram stop, there were no buses, so I walked home. My entire journey took 3hours 45 minutes.

I love London with a passion, but it still amazes me how a little bit of snow, can cause such havoc with our transport system.

DIY SOS !

So after this weekend, my man hunt attributes have to include DIY multi-skills. Yes,I know this has always been on my man must-haves list, but with good reason. In that time honoured tradition of things that go wrong when you really need them to work, my boiler packed up.

It actually packed up two weeks ago, but I had to wait for T (my lovely grumpy old Polish builder)to find time in his busy schedule (I have given his name to everyone I know after the magic he weaved at BB Towers!) to diagnose the problem.

"BB, immersion heater gone..you need buy new one. You get. I fix".

I spent half of my summer in B&Q, so it was like returning to a home from home hitting the aisles in search the missing link to restore my hot water supply.

P showed me where they were and couldn't resist adding,

"Your fella should be able to fix that in no time, it's dead simple"

Argh if only he knew. Finding a good, single, man is hard work as we all know - finding one with DIY skills is close to impossible.

Mr S couldn't hang a picture, let alone put together a flat pack. M took pride in telling me all the things wrong with my house and despite actually being in the trade was completely useless at DIY.

In fact,thinking back over my ex love interests none of them had any DIY or other 'skills' (meow!).

It took T exactly 15 minutes to install the new heater and put a massive grin back on my face!

Thanksgiving and Party Belles

First a massive Happy Thanksgiving to my US readers.

I am sending you lots of BB love from a freezing cold London. I wish you all a peaceful and Happy Thanksgiving with all your friends and family.

Here in London the temperature has dropped and at work I am surrounded by coughs, colds and more runny noses than you could shake a stick at.

Today I am bundled up in a jeans, thermal vest, t-shirt, cardigan, scarf (and this is just while I'm indoors!). Then of course there's my leather gloves, winter coat and new purple beret. Yep, it's blooming cold here.!

N came over to see if I had persuaded any eligible man under the age of 60 to accompany me to the Movember Gala tonight.

"No, it's a bit pants, but hey right at this moment I am hardly dressed for it!". I said laughing.

"What are you wearing for the Christmas party? " she asked.

Arr... the Christmas party that time honoured tradition of getting trolleyed with your workmates, drinking way too much (not me!) and then trying your best to get through the rest of the night without either snogging someone you shouldn't, telling your boss exactly what you really think of them or throwing up in front of ooh just anyone who happens to be passing by.

Then there's the morning after walk of shame. Not strictly reserved just for those who ended up going home with new 'friends', but also for those who just about made it into work in the morning.

This year's theme is Mad Men, which gives me the chance to release my inner Joan Harris (office manager at Sterling Cooper Draper Price - by the way if if you don't watch the show, you are soooo missing out!).

The theme is a godsend for me because it is all about your hourglass self being literally poured into delicious evening gowns.

Bring on the shopping !

Dateless Sticky Moment 101

I asked N to come to the Movember party with me tomorrow, in the hope of mischief, entertainment and a lot of laughter in a room full of moustache adorned men. Unfortunately, she's off to a concert with her sister, but she did helpfully suggest I go to Movember party with I.

No amount of hissed "He's busy already ", from me, could stop her offering me up as a minus 1, in need of a plus. He was of course busy (with his girlfriend no doubt) ....as is just about every other fun man I know within a 50 mile radius.

Poor D was the next unwilling potential escort and though under pressure, managed to respond...."I'm doing something with a friend", while staring intently at his laptop.

Bless him! He is one of those guys who never actually talks directly to me, unless he wants something. The idea of connecting socially with me was clearly too much for him to stand, even with other company.

I officially hate midweek parties, where going with boy with a moustache is necessary......oh dear how wrong that sounds !

Meanwhile back in the real world. JO is loving being a mommy to be, but hating morning or actually for her - all day nausea!

N invited me to spend Christmas with her and the Christmas orphans (any lone Australians, South Africans or haters of Chrismas like me!)

The plan is to eat until we're sick, then watch chick flicks and really dodgy TV - I may just be a Christmas convert after all !

Comings and Goings !

It's official JO is expecting - I'm so happy for her ! She is going to be such a great mom, not just because she's adorable, but because she has such a warm, loving way about her.

Her second bombshell which was a sad one for us, is that she is moving back to the States, due to a job opportunity for her husband. Great for them, rubbish for us as we are going to miss her.

S who always sees the best in everything, suggested to JO that she might want to

"...leave some of the clothes you won't be able to fit into anymore behind"

That's what I love about S, no matter how bad things are, she always finds a fashion positive!

Positive is exactly what I am trying to be about L's decision to stick by her cheating boyfriend, despite her friends best efforts.

Yes the very same charmer, who has cheated on her via the internet and in the real world too. That guy. Trust me I am holding back from what I actually want to call him.

As you know I'm a pretty fierce disapprover of cheating.....the only one who ever 'wins' if you can call it that, is the cheater. I've been on the end of it from both sides - as the cheated and the third wheel and all I can say is - welcome to Heartbreak High!

It's absolutely nothing to be proud of and something to be avoided at all costs. You either learn from it, or you bury your head in the sand and keep running on the 'love treadmill' that leads nowhere, with no one to blame but yourself.

Seeing one of your best friends first make the decision to stay with someone you know is absolutely wrong for them, and then watching them trying to work through and rationalise it, is tough.

I'll admit I've not talked to her in a few weeks, because I've had a few family dramas (yes, I don't tell you everything readers!) and I really don't understand her decision.

To be BB blunt, I know she is going to get hurt again, because the guy in question, would literally have to change his DA to be that 'one' guy she's looking for and deserves.

However, I do support L 100% as one of my best friends and because I know I can be beyond judgemental with that

"It is what it is!"

stubborn way I have sometimes,(I blame my Dad - I don't look like him much, but personality wise we are twins!), when we talked finally yesterday, I apologised for being a complete cow to her.

"I'm sorry I was harsh on you, but it is just because I don't understand why you don't value yourself as much as your family and friends do. You deserve better and from what I've seen of this smuck and how he's behaved, he isn't the guy. He doesn't matter, but you do, so I'm going back off about it. I'm just going to let you do your thing and I'll just zip it." I said.

I just about held it together (we've been friends since we were in school!) and I hate it when things are dodgy with us, which luckily is rare.

"Thank you for doing that and its because you are always so honest with me, and always put me first when it comes to this guy stuff and anything else that's going on with me in my life. I know its hard for you, but I have go with this. I know you hate it, but I have to try. I've got to see whether we can figure things out, but this time with what you and everyone has said to me, in the back of my head, not just rose tinted sunglasses." she replied.

"Well if they are this season's Gucci's, then maybe I'll let you off".

We both laughed and carried on catching up just like usual.

It was great to clear the air. I am really worried about her, but I can't save her on this one and maybe she just had to learn the hard way.

Whatever happens, I've got her back.

Foot and Mouth

I've always said that men are rubbish at keeping secrets, and even if they do manage to keep one, they tend to let the cat out of the bag at the most inappropriate moment.

Take the hapless intern who when asked by me where his boss (Jackie O aka JO) was replied

"She is off having her ultra sound!".

Cue "What!"from me.

"Are you sure you mean that?", from S, thinking he may have gotten confused with the language difference.

Realising his mistake from our surprised faces, he replied cheerily "Oh no, arrgh you didn't know. Oops!"

The Coffee, The Make-up Counter and the Dress

It's fair to say that when C and I get together we aren't quiet. Our conversation is a mix of stories, loud laughter, large dollops of gossip and mischief galore!

Way too much it seems for the nerd who told me off in Pret Manager.

"I can barely hear myself speak, can you just tone it down and shut up!"

As C had been doing the most laughing and the nerd had directed his fury at me, I let him have it.

"I wasn't making any noise actually, so don't yell at me and you might want to think about your tone it's very rude!".

His friend nodded in agreement, looking at me sympathetically and tried to get him to shut up.

"I don't care who's fault it is, just shut up". He replied raising his voice further.

"If anyone needs to shut up it's you sour puss".

Before he could stammer a reply, we apologised to the elderly couple sat beside us, who said that we had been fine and left, not before I had shot the nerd a withering diva putdown look and swished my weave. He could just sod right off !

Next stop was the MAC counter, where C was served by an assistant who had trawled her foundation on so heavily, that you could see a tidemark on her top and the difference in colour between her face and neck.

Clearly, she missed the blending lesson at beauty school.

Having plastered a sample on C, I had to intervene to avoid foundation overload.

"She needs the foundation in light to mid coverage, with warm orange tones, not yellow as they make her look grey". I said helpfully.

She ignored me completely, proceeded to put on the yellow beige tone and looked pissed off, when C told her it was "Horrible". Job done!

We hit the shoes, were I found the most gorgeous aqua blue cross front sandals, with a zip in the back, which were of course in small feet size only!

C is a designer princess who thinks high street fashion should be avoided at all costs. She spends money like water and then wonders where its all gone!

For fun I lured her into H&M. As I pointed clothes out, she confessed that she'd just brought a Roberto Cavalli dress.

"You did what !" I said.

"It's an investment!" she sniffed before telling me that it cost one month's mortgage payment.

"You're not keeping it" I said firmly.

"I'll think about sending it back" She winked cheekily at me.

Happy Friday or Lucky Me !

Last night I met up with SW and had a great time. I used to work at SW and unlike those people who always say "we must keep in touch", he actually did.

He is one of those positive energy people that everyone should have in their lives. He's smart, wise, cute as a button and has the self depreciating humour of someone who is content with themselves and their lives.

Spending time with him was so easy and over four hours we caught up on our lives, people we know, obviously gossiped for England and laughed a lot. As I ran through some of my more notable social and romantic disasters this year, I realised just how lucky I am.

Aside from my family, I have to say I some truly awesome friends who keep me in check and offer me unstinting support, even when I am being a complete tool !

Regardless of my numerous romantic misadventures, bouts of diva frustration and anger at myself when I completely bulls up, I'm still standing.

There is joy in my life daily and although I'm not sharing it with Mr "Real Deal" right now, I am sharing it with people I love, value and respect,which makes me feel proud and rich every day; particularly coming to the end of a year which has been so tough.

"To get the full value of joy, you must have someone to divide it with"
(Anonoymous or the contents of my fortune cookie from Dim T last night!)

Shocking Screensaver !

C came down to earth with a crashing thump today, following job triumph yesterday. Her Moonlighting squeeze, has apparently been squeezing someone else and is so enamoured with her, that she is his screen saver on his work laptop.

Her text message interrupted an otherwise mediocre day for me.

"Shit BB, I think B's got some bird's photograph as his screen saver ! OMG! Nooo!"

I had a quick OMG moment and of course laughed my head off - come it was funny!.

Honestly though are these two ever going to sort themselves out?

I read the message again, laughed and then picked up the phone to offer some morale support.

"You always send the best, perfectly timed funny messages ! Now first, calm down. You don't know what the score is with this other lady. I mean she could be his favour glamour model or maybe and actress he fancies. Have you noticed this screen saver before?"

"Arr.....no I don't think so" C replied. "I know what you're saying but my friend is a friend of his friend, and they're going out for a drink so she's going do some digging and find out what's going on. I need to know!".

"You sound like a total nutcase! As I said calm down and just wait and see what happens".

I could tell she was convinced or impressed by my advice...

"I've gotta go", she said closing the conversation.

"Don't worry about it", I almost finished saying before she put the phone down.

Oh dear !

Red Letter Day !

You know those days where everything goes right, well I've just had one !

I had lunch with M....God I miss seeing him everyday. We caught up on everything and then M told me about his big news. He's going to be a Daddy again. He showed me the scan and I acted like a doting nanny goat!

After lunch, I hung out in my favourite place in London - The National Portrait Gallery. After checking out 'An Englishman in New York: Photographs by Jason Bell', I had afternoon tea in the Portrait Restaurant, before heading home.

I found a letter on my doormat from the taxman! Just what I need, I thought as ripped open the envelope and found a rebate cheque....hooray !

While I was checking through my emails I saw a message from N which made me laugh. N is South African, beautiful both inside(although she pretends she isn't!) and out (although she doesn't realise it!), funny as hell and just as smart.

She's been looking for a new place to rent for a while and guess what she's finally found somewhere. My phone bleeped with a message from C who's been waiting to hear whether she landed a 'mega change her life job' and yes you've guessed it - she got it!

Finally S texted to confirm dinner on Thursday, which is great because we always have a good time.

As I said it's been a great day!

BB's Day Off !

Unbelievably, I have the day off, well actually two days off.

It didn't stop me waking up at usual time, blitzing the living room and kitchen on a cleaning sweep and all of that before doing an hour's worth of yoga.

Then my day really got going. First a facial, then as (it is payday!),I paid some bills, brought my dress for the Christmas party and the sexiest pair of beyond fierce shoes.

These footie fireworks are hot, hot purple peeptoes with crocodile trim. With the right dress and a naughty man, this diva could get herself into world of trouble in those shoes ! I love them!

And I love having the day off, I'd almost forgotten what that was. Tomorrow I'm having lunch with M and I have to sort out my New York trip.

Somebody take me to the plane!

Deja Vu and other stuff!

After my catch up with A, some cheeky twittering and a particularly gorgeous dinner, I was in the mood to chill out big time.

Until the X Factor results!

Damnit! The Weasel beat the chopping block again curtesy of the mighty Mr Cowell, who once again saved Katie the Weasel....what he won't do for ratings!

It ended up going to deadlock, where somehow the British public managed to vote for the Weasel over the 'beautiful boy' Aiden.

My sadness lasted only until 'I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here!' started.

GM has "village idiot" tattoed on her. She's signed up for a show, based in the jungle having declared says she hates spiders and just about every other living thing.

Cue laughter and the public voting for her to do a challenge every day.

I give her two days !

Busted and Foraging !

I love the fact that my friends call me out, particularly when it comes to making me admit to things I'd rather not.

I met up with C in town to catch up and before you could say let's have another latte, she was on my case about I.

"I've read the blog and I'm telling you, you like him more than you're letting on!"

"I'm not saying yes or no", I said staring into my latte, hoping she'd change the subject.

"Which means you do. You always do this. It's all secret squirrel when you actually like someone. Totally off the radar. Why do you think I read your blog? You're so bloody laid-back and neutral, guys get that tomboy friendly vibe from you, instead of fancying you, they put you in the friends zone which is why he told you about the other girl!"

"You mean his new mega gorgeous girlfriend, who he's besotted with", I said helpfully.

"Yes, but you don't even know that for sure. He could just be foraging!"

"Foraging !"I snorted, spluttering out some of my latte and then laughing hard.

"You know exactly what I mean missus. Break-up bootycall ! We've all done it. Just tell him. Break the habit of a life time and tell him !"

"....and make a complete prat of myself, no thank you! Nothing to tell cherub, he's just not into me, he's very, very happy elsewhere and that's fair enough!"

"Coward!" C chimed.

"Maybe but at least he has absolutely no idea and won't look at me like I'm some sort of sad looney tune! They're loved up and that's that."

I was still thinking about what she said when I got home.

10mins later she texted me.

"You're right of course! By the way I hate it when you're right. I just want you to be happy. You are right not to waste your time on a non-starter. Life's too short. When a guy really likes you, he'll go out of his way to make sure you know about it and you my dear are most definitely worth it!! Keep fishing! -x- "

So Long LoLo !

I should be saying Happy Friday...but I just can't do it....as today is LL's last day sob.....!

She has spent most of the morning wondering why she drank so much last night and whether her brain can continue to function to the end of the day.

She has also tried to remember blurred conversations that happened last night...the most notable being N's tale of her best friend who was killed by a Great White Shark...random leaving drinks subject matter but hey ho !

Finally, she has also given me that department leavers scarce, of asking me, whether she needed to tell IT that she sort of tipped water on her laptop.....how she managed this I am still trying to figure out !

Right now, thankfully she is having a pizza lunch. Hopefully, it will soak up some of the alcohol, line her stomach and make up for last night's dinner of peanuts and crisps, provided by N.

As LL has the constitution of an industrial waste compressor, I have no doubt she will stagger through to the end of the day, before taking off into the night to meet up with yet more friends for more mischief in of all places.....Swindon !

Bye Bye LL.


Missing you already !


BB
-xx-

Rant Over and Looking Back !

It's ok, I've stopping ranting now !

So onto the good stuff.

First, and this is me getting a little drippy here - thanks for continuing to read my ramblings.

It is pretty amazing looking back on some of my entries from last year and the beginning on this year and seeing the growth in me both as a person and thankfully in my writing style.....!

If you like what I've been doing remember to pass on the word about your favourite diva's blog to your friends and family. I think I've been stuck on 24 followers for about six months...lets's push those numbers up!

I love hearing from you all (the good stuff and your tellings off when you think I am being a pain....it is all truly grounding!) and would love to connect to other people as well.

Now all about A...it was great to see him yesterday. It took me back to all those latte moments as we sat down to lunch together. When I look back at my time with my old company I do it with joy now.

Aside from all the mess with HWMBO, I met and worked with some incredible people and of course got to work with M again!

Sorry for leaving you behind M, but you know I still love you!

A was definitely one of my high points and continues to be a truly amazing friend who I love dearly. He made me laugh like a drain and it was so damn good to see him again. The only downside is that he still doesn't know whether he got the mega job, he recently interviewed for.

A, I have every single body part crossed for you ! If I can spin crap (HWMBO) into gold (my present life), then for you babe for it should be a breeze !!

Big Love

BB

In Remembrance

I'm sorry but I need to rant about today's two minute silence. The lack of respect by some associates regarding taking two minutes out of their precious liberty-laced, free days was incredibly disappointing.

First, there was a bungled tannoy message so low that not everyone heard it. Joined up thinking would have suggested that an email reminding everyone that the silence was imminent might have been a sensible idea, but no.

Then came the a new recruit who decided it was the perfect time to break the silence with her laptop log on tune.

Even S who I expected much better from, managed to distinguish himself by talking on the phone through the duration of the two minute silence, pausing briefly only to tell the caller on the line,

"I'm in the middle of a two minute silence here! "

Crass at the very least - it was two bloody minutes! Why he couldn't have just said I'll call you back. Hardly rocket science big guy! I was so annoyed I told him off afterwards.

Totally disrespectful from all concerned.

In these troubled times, as our troops continue fighting in Afghanistan and Iraq, and thousands of others who have gone before them in WW1 and WWII; they all deserve and should be remembered by us, the ones that stay at home.

We should not forget that their sacrifice has preserved our liberty, freedom of speech and self determination, free from censorship and dictatorship.

Our remembrance of those who have fought and are fighting for us should be regarded as a fundamental to our lives, not an incremental extra to be fitted in around phone calls, emails and the small stuff we waste our lives sweating on!

What Women Want !

In the course of dating what seems like half of London (well that's includes all of my dates who couldn't be bothered to show up!), it has become apparent that women's expectations of dating are on a whole different level compared to some men.

I checked my dating inbox, first up was Mr Dad ( not an issue for me, most of the guys I'm looking at will already have kids, be divorced or just have baggage), 50 (big issue - way, way too old for a firecracker like moi !) , from Crawley (I'll let that slide!), had sent me 3 emails.

The first entitled 'Your bum' - took me by surprise, as he ran through the A-Z of all the good points of my profile picture (it is just a head and shoulders shot!) and then added that we'd be perfect together !

Looking at his profile album (15 pictures of him in various gurning poses!), I beg to differ !

Email two from Mr D, suggested that I could contact him via his three personal emails and his mobile number which he helpfully provided so it was 'convenient for me'!. Email three was Mr D's compatibility quiz. Surprisingly enough I didn't respond the trio of correspondence from Mr D.

I shifted through some other possibles. Included was a response from one of those faceless profiles that lazy men love so much online. By lazy I mean the men that can't be bothered to fill in their profiles past the most basic profile information.

To me a man who actually states that he couldn't upload a picture, instantly hits my radar as being non-technical and someone to be treated with caution. Despite me explicitly stating on my profile - 'no picture, no response'- faceless men keep tracking, winking at and sending me emails. Why ? Why waste their time and mine?

Regardless of what dating men think, a faceless profile is always greeted by women with suspicion for the following reasons:

1) You are probably married or involved.

2) You have probably been caught out internet dating on the sly before, while married or single.

3) You are not immediately pleasing to the eye - remember beauty or handsomeness is in the eye of the beholder - for goodness sake, give us ladies the opportunity to at least judge for ourselves fairs fair !

4) You are afraid someone you might know, might spot you online.

5) You have something to hide, not sure what.....but it's definitely shady.

"Liked your profile, would like to meet you" said Mr Forward.

I responded " No picture, no interest sorry.... not fair that you have the advantage of seeing me"

Mr F : "I like to keep you ladies in suspense and when I tell you that I'm looking for passionate xxx, you all seem to do a runner"

" ...and that is precisely where you are going wrong and why you remain single. It's all about those first impressions. I'm sure Ms Right is out there somewhere. Good luck with you search", I replied.

"There is no such thing as Ms or Mr Right, I wish you women would just get over all this false advertising and just be up for having some fun !!!!" ranted Mr F.

"You seem so angry "I replied. "I suggest you either lower your potential partner age range or why not pay for some fun. It might be easier and should help you with your anger issues".

He didn't reply.....!

Latte Angels and Au Revoir !

OMG !! The Latte Angels have answered my prayers and.....guess what?

A will be making a guest appearance at my work tomorrow ! Hooray !! Yes, A is coming to my workplace, for a conference we are hosting ....JOOY!!!

Oh the fun and mischief we will have (well at lunch time anyway!). I can't wait to see him. His arrival should hopefully distract me from the fact that LL is leaving this Friday.

What can I say about LL - meeting her was liking finding my slightly nuttier twin !

She's super clever and crazy silly. She owns probably the fiercest wardrobe and shoe collection ever and my goodness she has make my work life a blast.

We started at the company round about the same time and bounded over inefficient systems (she didn't get paid for two months, and I managed to get paid for four days).

Over the following months, I got to know and like her tons - she's like this force of nature that should have a hurricane rating all of her own !

No matter how rubbish things are, she just deals with them - sure there's been the odd weeping willow moment every now and then (but hell we've all had those) and when I first arrived here I missed A and M so much, she was the one person who understood me the way they did.

Now she's buggering off.

1) To escape the boss from hell (a nit-picking HWMBO clone!)

2) because life is short and dog sledging in Finland and spending Christmas in Paris sure beats working!

Foot and Mouth moment of the day goes to Ms Thang who managed to tell size 8 J, that she had put on weight since she joined the company.

Cue gasps from the rest of us and a flicked ear (me flicking hers, she deserved it, she was totally ruuddde!) for being so ruthlessly frank about J, who has the kind of figure most women would kill for; even if they owned it for just a few hours!

Her F & M moment continued when she reminded Mr Mom how old he was, by saying his hearing isn't the greatest. R let Ms Thang have it.

"Maybe we need to contact the embassy to get them to revoke your visa. There are three things we ladies don't talk about in this country, weight, age and money. Time for you to Sssh now !"

Rainy Monday

There's something about a rainy Monday morning that makes you wonder first, why you have to go to work and second, makes you people watch a little more intently than usual to distract yourself from the crap weather.

In the latte queue (which still remains not half as much as fun since my days of mischief with A!), I overhead typically cute, but attached studmuffin BD talk bout his equally super cute daughter and her swimming lessons.

"She's fearless for a little bit, then she realises she might sink and starts calling to me in case she goes under, but she's doing really well" .

As I put the lid on my hazelnut, caramel latte ( my little piece of morning heaven!), I learnt that S and J are on a break, something which judging from the whiny recollection of he says, she says, from S, J is probably hugely relieved about.

When I finally managed to log onto my laptop ( how does it know to die on Monday first thing?), my day instantly brightened with a message in my inbox from Big D. He is finally, finally back in the land of the mortgage slave and is already missing the freedom of being an adult gap year traveller.

Goodness knows who his latest conquest (s) is/are but no doubt I'll hear all the gory details. It would be nice to think of him 'behaving' for a change, but I don't think he is quite ready to stop being a bow wow just yet !

While Big D continues to do what he does best, Mr Invisible, who I thought I'd finally shaken off, has remerged like a sleepwalking zombie, who can smell its next prey.

I swear among life's many weird moments, one of the biggest ones is why,when you don't like someone, they pursue you regardless. Of course I've done it myself. Haven't we all?

X-Factor, Love or Hate It !

Ok you should never ever try and call me when the X Factor is on.

Ok I'll admit it is my destination tv spot. I don't bother with tv that much during the week, but come Saturday night, there I am like some crazed armchair critic, marking the contestants like some over eager Simon Cowell clone; and I'm just as bad on the Sunday results show.

Right now I'm mad as hell that Treyc - the little woman with 'the big voice', has just been voted off, instead of the devil child Katie, who sings like a strangled foghorn.

This annoying, latern-jawed, media whore, who actually gave up singing halfway through and resorted to sitting on the stage, begging to be saved by the judges, which they duly did.

The lame arse excuse given to vote off Treyc was that she was someone who the public didn't want to see. Completely untrue because I wanted to continue to watch her, along with all the other people who've been voting for her!

For such an apparently unpopular act, her departure has certainly got people's backs up. Twitter is all a flutter !

Put Them Away Ms Universe !

What makes a woman regularly described as 'stunning', turn up to work dressed in a low cut playsuit in November, drawing extra attention to herself, which have been in equal measures admiring and disapproving.

There is a huge difference in the perception of a woman's dress by the sexes, whereas most of the men in the office, who usually suffer stalk eye syndrome were delighted; LL described me as 'being a prude', when I said that Ms Universe's outfit was
' inappropriate for work'.

LL is one of those ladies who has a unique style and sense of fashion and consequently always looks amazing however, she has never, ever felt the need to put her non-too shabby assets out on display, she lets her work and business acumen do the talking.

Could it be that either MU is an attention seeker, or is she just trying to keep a certain someone dangling, until she is ready to dally with him again !

Just One Of Those Days

You can rely on London Transport to strike just for the hell of it, as happened today and you can rely on me to tell someone like it is, when they totally annoy me.

Mr Mom has the truly irritating and demeaning habit of calling his direct colleagues (who are female, infinitely brighter, funnier and more attractive then him!) 'the girls', like they are some dolly birds or dimwits who can't think for themselves.

He tends to do it most often in front of anyone of consequence or authority, as if presenting them to the world as his minions, who are indirectly responsible to him.

Yesterday I pulled him on it, face to face (because he definitely needed to hear it) and it took every vestige of self control not to deck him, when he tried to dismiss my complaints as me "being rude" to him - how ironic from an unashamed insecure, whingy, male chauvinist.

Consequently today, to avoid seeing his smug cabbage doll face, I took myself off to sit elsewhere.

I powered my way through a stack of work - some people eat, drink or smoke more when they're pissed off, I work until my head hurts.

Love Is In The Air !

It seems the quest for love is not just restricted to the young in my family. My ever so proper mum has bagged herself an admirer.

A chance meeting with a very charming Dutch man has left her somewhat flustered and knowing I am such an expert in affairs of the heart, she called me to ask for advice.

He attempted a swift almost first date peck on the lips and she side swiped him with a cheek to cheek. Too cold? she mused.

I tried to reassure her.

" You did entirely the right thing re: the kiss. You don't know him from Adam and if this were a first date proper, you probably wouldn't kiss him, it is not in your nature to be that forward. Also you are a bit rusty on the old dating front".

It's amazing how easy it is giving love advice out. Sometimes I surprise myself by taking my own.

Remember my Halloween buddy? It turns out my being knackered and then not letting my imagination run wild for once, was a super smart move on my part. Maybe even I sign that I might be on the right side of date smart.

After agreeing with me that dating or sleeping with 'randoms' was so retro and the reserve of very silly men indeed, He mentioned a particular girl pal who he thought had a crush on him, who had just split with her boyfriend....

You can guess the rest.....

"Everyone had a good time!" he smirked, with the glee of a man who had just got his groove on, after playing the waiting game. They are now a very loved up item.

Many moons ago, I might have wasted a moment or too trying to figure out why I didn't end up with someone like him. Why I wasn't good or hot enough. Why once again has some other chick turned out to be totally drop dead and compared to me, the exact just what he was waiting for it.

After all we're the same age, both got quite a lot of stuff in common right? The same type of humour etc and if I do say so myself, on paper we would probaly be one of those annoyingly chilled couples, that can't be bothered to fight and just likes hanging out together and with friends.

Not anymore. You can't knock a guy for not fancying you. Goodness knows I've had enough experience ! Much of it my own fault, pursuing lost causes and unavailables.

For those of you who are still pursuing the guy whose not interested, once again i have to say, it's just one of those things and hating him is a waste of time. Really you should have stopped doing that when you were in college - Just directed at those of you who still do that!

When the right hottie shows up, he will be exactly who his window dressing says he is and be 100% interested in you.

If he can cook and DIY, then it's diva bonus points all round; and as we all know these are the very best kind to win!

Halloween and Chillin'

Halloween started out with a bang, when I discovered that putting your costume in an identical bag to your general rubbish isn't the smartest thing to do and I ended up of course grabbing the wrong bag in a hurry.

I only noticed my error during a costume show and tell of our Halloween outfits at work!

I went back home at lunchtime, picked up the right bag, then bolted out of my house in time to demonstrate my best sprinting action, as I just managed to catch the bus back to the railway station.

By the end of the day, we were all up for a serious dose of Halloween mischief. Over the space of two hours, we transformed ourselves into jacked up clowns, black cats, Death, dead zebras (sick, but inspired from MVH and mega popular with the ladies!) and my personal favourite, because it was my own costume - a Graveyard cemetery angel !

I managed to shake my booty, despite wearing a to the floor dress and negotiating angel wings that started the evening erect, but ended up misshapen and slightly wonky.

Just before the stroke of midnight, I found myself in a taxi with I. I joined our company a few months ago and is definitely one of life's good guys - articulate, mega intelligent, cheeky beyond belief and one of those rare grown-up men, who tells you like it is, completely unvarnished.

Boy did we talk! Life, relationships, work, music, family, religion...the works...just the type of conversations I love.

I'd forgotten how cool is is to hang out with a guy and just banter. You see aside from F and my other treasured male buddies, finding new men you can have a laugh and a joke with and some general banter can be difficult. If they are also cute (a rarity for me, since I like more quirky men) they are like an endangered species.

The fact that I is my age means we can cut to the chase. Talk about silly things and have a common reference points. With the serious stuff, there isn't the need to chase our tails trying to make things over complicated, when putting the world to rights from the safety of a comfy couch.

The banter was so good, that it took me until 2pm to realise I was absolutely starving. Before you could say 'What's in your fridge', he was whizzing round the kitchen and whipped up a 'Masterchef' moment. without a batting an eyelid....result and bloody tasty too !

Before you get excited no there's no need to buy a hat!. I've long since stopped planning that happy endings with eligible men, just because we get along.

Also, he spent 20 minutes banging on about two sweet little poppets of eyecandy he hangs out with regularly. He even showed me a picture of them kissing, which looked like one of those dreamy indie album covers.

One of the two, he most definitely has a thing for, even though he didn't admit it, but that's some men for you....always give the impression that they are keeping their options open, even when they're hooked up - the little devils !

In fact it's misreading 'moments' and maybes like that by me, that has most definitely contributed to some of my previous relationships failings and idealistic expectations on the relationship front.

Fortunately, I seem to be getting better at figuring that stuff out....well sort of !

I know I'm not in the right place to deal with anyone right now, because I am completely knackered. What a year it's been! It's been bloody great and bloody hard as well.

I'm a little frustrated with myself. Work has been beyond great, since leaving HWMBO's regime, I have become one fierce, fearless diva!

My house is getting there, it more BBish and less old lady decorating mistake !

But my personal stuff has been beyond pants, in fact it's been a real challenge to be party to and to own to my mistakes and issues.

The good news is I'm finally out of that roller-coaster funk of self doubting and loathing and am looking forward to much deserved happier times.

This good fortune awaits all of us who continue to live in hope and trust in good stuff and good people entering our lives if we just believe it and live it.

The Italian Kiss Off !

No matter how hard she tries, and perhaps she needs to think a little less about his feelings - this lovesick puppy has now taken to going through her facebook pictures and commenting on them - in Italian !! LL has not been able to escape the ardent attentions of her young buck.

Until today, when she texted him the following.

"I don't think I we should see each other again !"

Direct, but effective or so we thought, until his response.
"Why?"

She hasn't responded.

I Would Do Anything But I Won't Do That !

....My prayers have been answered and my friend made it big-time! She has an excellent long-term prognosis and we can all breathe again, thank God. I was so bloody grateful to see her up and about, I hugged her way too long and just about held back from crying.

Elsewhere,my worst fears have been been confirmed. After just a few short weeks of separation and attempting to re-enter the tunnel of non-love - commonly known as crappy dating (a universe I know so well!), L is ready to throw in the towel and take him back for what seems to me the most unfortunate of reasons.

We talked over the weekend and she declared.

"I'm not ready to come home yet"

If marrying him to get residency is the only way to keep her US dream alive, then right now that's what she's prepared to do and second because she believes (she says)it is better the devil she knows, to stuck with him.

Listening to someone convince themselves to do something which is potentially one of the most detrimental things, they can do to themselves, is like being a bystander at a car crash, you know you could have stopped.

After all we are talking about a guy that didn't cheat once, he cheated repeatedly over the course of a two year relationship in a very deliberate and calculating way. He even tried to convince her that she was being unreasonable and jealous...the trait of a well seasoned cheat.

Even when he got busted he pulled the "I always thought you would leave me!" card and then proceeded to go on about being prepared to do anything he could to stay with her, including the counselling she had been talking about for months previously.

What amazes me is how an otherwise street saavy, academically bright, together woman could seriously think that a cheat is all she is worthy of. L bemoaned "the fallow dating ground" and talked about "time running out" for her in terms of finding someone available and having children.

Speaking as a diva with universally acknowledged pants taste in men. Someone who has made some of the most stupid decisions for my life, based on my gut instinct and feelings and then spent ages getting over it, I have to say I genuinely surprised in the change in her since she moved abroad.

Despite probably having every romantic notion of mine rubbished and contradicted, I still believe that 'settling'isn't a recipe for personal unhappiness.

Believe me I've tried it.

Two years with R (one year happy, so completely unhappy,that just one chaste, but lust fuelled dinner with H made me realise what I'd been missing - or so I thought! ).

My three year long distance mayhem with the American - we broke up more times than some people date for, serially breaking each other's hearts as we just couldn't figure out how to make it work both ways.

And how could I forget more recently M, who I initially didn't like, who I let my guard down with, began a relationship with only for him to say he could never, ever fall in love with me, capping my misery by telling me to "Be lucky!".

Despite everything, I still believe there is somebody out there who thinks that hanging out with me is not akin to a slow death. That gets my dodgy humour, thinks I look okish with my warpaint on, trusts me implicitly and totally has my back no matter what. Did I wait all this time to end up with someone who treats me like crap and doesn't value me.

Hell no! I changed tact with L and appealed to her better judgement.

"You are essentially someone who wants what your folks have. It isn't perfect, but its real. A partnership between two people who have accepted each other faults and all and decided to stick it out. Not to lie or cheat on each other, to hang on in there no matter what; even when walking through the door is an easy option. If you think that selling the hope of the 'real deal' with someone, for a passport and a few years spent with someone you don't trust in a country you don't want to leave is ok, then go for it, but I know you better than that".

Even if the guy had multiple passports and was beyond solvent, I would still have to reconcile that price, versus my ability to put my head on my pillow at night and feel ok with what my part of what our relationship bargain was.

I am content with my friends and family (nearly all the time!), great job (nearly all the time!), beautiful home (nearly all the time!) and weave (there's no such thing as a black woman who is totally satisfied with their weave - we always want more!).

Sure I have lonely days, pathetically lonely days, where I doubt myself on every level from attractiveness, intelluct even down to just feeling like there is something fundamentally unloveable about the B, I show to the world every day. But the minute we abandon all hope, we might as well throw in the towel.

Just like love, hope is the torch of honesty, that I think is the core of any relationship be it romantic or platonic. Our destiny is in our hands, what you wish for yourself, can only be limited by you. This is what I feel she is doing and I sincerely hope she will not come to bitterly regret the path, she seems intent on taking.

The Leveller !

There's one leveller in life that hits us all rich or poor, happy or sad, is the loss of our health.

I count myself incredibly lucky in that despite some harsh times, I've been relatively unscathed by ill health or the loss of a loved one.

The closest person I had to a mother was taken from me when I was 22 and to this day when something great happens, I have to stop myself from picking up the phone and calling her. She was a truly incredible, strong, loving woman whose death was one of the most terrible things that has ever happened to me.

When my much loved super cranky Dad was seriously ill a couple of years ago, I became Little Ms Practical.

I was the only child he told and for the duration of his treatment, I went from home, work, hospital and back home again like some mindless robot nurse. I didn't cry once, not until he got the all clear and then I wept like a baby.

Maybe I thought after that, I would never have to watch someone I care about deal with the fear and uncertainty of a life threatening illness.

Today, a very good friend of mine is undergoing an operation to save her life. I don't know what the outcome will be, but I pray she makes it.

Laugh til You Cry !

As you all know I am a diva who likes to laugh..... hard! My laugh has been described at various times as being 'sexy', 'filthy', 'downright dirty' and 'infectious'.

With a weapon like that in my life's personality arsenal, it is fair to say that dates and friends need to be able to to turn my dial and make me laugh like a drain hopefully as often as possible.

C didn't let me down today. She called from her hotel to fill me in on her date with her man of choice....the only way I can describe these two is being like a downmarket version of Cybil Shepherd and Bruce Willis on Moonlighting.

This throughly daft pair of star-crossed lovers have been dancing around each other for the last 3 months. Neither of them will actually admit to liking the other, just in case they are wrong and make tits of themselves.

So far he's told a few people he thinks she is super hot and she's got slaughtered, but it didn't stop her saying explaining in exact detail what she wanted to do to him. Since both omissions they have been quietly been getting to know each other.

This they both ended up at a conference. He suggested they go jogging together, then forgot to bring his trainers. She was disappointed to hear he planning to go out for a few drinks with the boys.

That is until he showed up in the hotel lobby ready to take her out. After slipping into some killer heels and a dress that could get an angel in trouble, they set off on the short walk to the restaurant.

"I was so bloody happy to be spending time with him, that I got stomach craps, and then I sort of couldn't breathe, cause I was excited and then I really let myself down!"

"What did you do?", I replied, steadying myself for an impending belly laugh.

"Well it was all going really, really well, until I farted!"

"You did what?", I said laughing so hard, that I couldn't hold back the tears.

"I farted, really loudly. So loudly I couldn't even pass it off as someone else, as there was only the two of us there, and he knew it wasn't him that did it !".

"I know I said make an impression, I meant a good one, not a long lingering one", I said, just about able to speak.

"You not gonna tell anyone are you are you?" C pleaded.

"Are you kidding, this is comedy gold cherub", I said still laughing.

"Well at least don't use my name?"

"No problem Chenelle !"

Are There Any Good Samaritans Left ?

Would you intervene if you saw someone in trouble?

I was shocked as I got of the train to see a fellow passenger being held in a headlock by another passenger. The passenger in the headlock cried out for assistance and was completely ignored by a crowd of people who thought it was ok to stare, but didn't want to get 'involved'.

I ran up the platform to find a member of staff and led a rather stroppy uniformed penguin to the incident. At the same time, the prisoner was released and the member of staff turned to blow her whistle, to prompt the train to depart. I interrupted her.

"Are you nuts? You've just seen what he did to that passenger and you want to let him remain on the train, to potentially do the same thing to other passengers? Don't you realise you have a duty of care when your wearing that uniform to the safety of your passengers?" I said angrily.

"It's not my problem!", was her curt response.

If we all take the same charming attitude that she did, then does that mean the self preservation will take preference over helping someone in trouble.

I really hope not.

The Not So Great Date

No not mine.....my favourite Aussie minx LL, fought against the tide and decided that a younger man (22) might well be the answer to her man drought. She has been avoiding men since her last 'boy' handed her the bill for his weekend with her, when she paid a little too much attention (he thought) to someone else.

She met the 22 year old in a bar, and in a wine soaked fun haze, found him charming (despite his broken Italian English, cute (pub lighting is always so flattering!), fun (he laughed at her jokes) and ultimately was the complete opposite of the guys she's been used to.

They went out to dinner this week and of course the next day, our little click, couldn't wait to hear all the gory details.

"Good or bad?" I said using my Caesar gladitor thumb move.

"Pretty rubbish" she replied laughing hard.

After my morning latte, I swing my chair round to face her and get a full date debrief.

During the course of a fragmented date she identified three deal breakers for any girl about town.

1 Mr Wonderful shared a room with one other to save money - being careful with your money when you're young is totally acceptable,, but get your love interest to sign on the dotted line, that she's ok to share cheeky moments with you, and an uninvited other is pushing things.

2 He had their entire relationship mapped out to June next year including Christmas holiday and mini breaks,

3 He was a bad kisser - some things you should really be good at and if you are rubbish at them, you should get to grips with pronto.

With the memory and remnants of a particularly rubbish snogging session flashing before her eyes, she decided that she had to tell him that she couldn't take things any further.

"Why are all of my dates so rubbish?" she wailed.

"Maybe because you go after what you shouldn't babe. 10 years between a man and women are like dog years. He's not in a place you need him to be and you are where he's going to be in surprise, surprise 10 years !". We both laughed.

A Miracle For All Of Us

Among the day to day monotony of our lives, mini rises and falls, come moments where you truly feel and embrace the miracle that is human life and the preciousness of it.

I stayed up last night like so many others to watch anxiously to see whether the Chilean miners would be rescued. I went to bed disappointed and really worried while final checks on the rescue capsule were made. When I awoke this morning, the first thing I did was turn on the radio to get an update.

My relief at the first of the men being brought to the surface, took me into an unexpected meltdown as I cried with the young boy who was reunited with his father.

I couldn't imagine for a second being forced to survive for sixty-nine days, underground, cut off from my friends and family I would have lost it, even if I had pen and paper write my feelings down on.

In the coming days and weeks there will no doubt be numerous press angles, focusing on the miners individual experiences, fears, challenges and hopes to not only survive but be reunited with their families again.

I really hope their stories focus on the strength of human spirit in adversity, as opposed to the already colourful emerging revelations that at least two of the men had secret mistresses,who have turned up to reclaim their men.

Twenty-four hour news is a wonderful thing, but the need to keep its media content live, so hot that it's a redtop hot exclusive, sometimes means that even the purest of miracles can become tarnished.

Holy Moly - Men Can Be Real Bitches !

There is nothing funnier than watching two testosterone soaked men, circling each other like two Essex girls at a Cricket dress sale, before going at it over the most trival arguement ever !

I couldn't resist staying behind at work to finish off my prep notes for a virtual training session I was holding with the States. My new neighbour aka Mr Mom - the man who loves his child tooooo much, had to work late.

To prevent the ineventual conversation about his child's latest amazing feat, I popped my headphones in and prayed he would shut up. No such joy.

His boss whose management expertise consists of last minute.comitis - the ability to leave everything business priority tasks to the very last minute and then expect your entire team to work late, to save your arse !); was on the war path.

The arguement between Mr Mum and Mr Last Minute started over nothing, but it got lively enough for me to remove my headphones and listen in, while still tapping furiously on my keyboard.

Mr Last Minute started with a few upper cuts before delivering a low blow.

"You lied about this piece of work and consequently, the whole body of work need to be revisited. I don't like liars!"

It turns out that being called a liar is the button, that can turn Mr Mom into the incredible Hulk and he hit back (verbally!), with a body rocking upper cut.

"How dare you! How dare you call me a liar. I am sitting here trying to make sense of work model that doesn't work. I've been given inconsistent information, which I am trying to reconcile. I'm tired, I'm frustrated and you've just been riding me. I just don't need it or appreciate it. I've got too much work today!"

"Too much to do. I give you real work, let's really get you spinning some plates. That's what I do every day. The fact of the matter is you lied and I don't like it!"

That's when Mr Mom fired the salvo no boss wants to hear from a member of staff during a crisis they've delegated to their team to handle.

"I'm telling you again don't call me a liar. I made a mistake, I gave you some information I believed to be true and as it turns out it's not. Don't you talk to me like that. Remember I'm a contractor, I don't have to stay here working late and if you continue like this ....I'll walk. I mean it, I'll walk!".

My typing speeded up considerably, as I tried to look like I was so into my work that I couldn't hear the arguement. Heaven only knows how I mentioned to keep from laughing out loud at these two peacocks trying to prove who could shout the loudest.

We all think that women are nature's bitches (when pushed), but after that little handbag shuffle, I say the men have it by a whisker!

Express Yourself !

Work has been nuts...totally and completely nuts and maybe it's just what I needed after this the relevation from L that she is still in contact with her cheating X. He is now in 'therapy' for his 'issues' - I've never heard the inability to commit or habitual need to cheat on your other half, ever described as 'issues' before !

L reminds me so much of the mire of 'what if',I've been guilty in the past of wallowing in. I admit It is amazing how clearly you see crappy situations and the shitty behaviour of people when you are not directly having to deal with it.

Its another one of those relationship things, that I've finally figured out. Staying with someone, because you're worried you won't find someone else is hardly the premise of someone with a healthy outlook at relationships; or the likelihood to be in the right state to be able to form good ones.

O finally got back in touch via....email (not text) which is of course the death nail to any association. His cheery remoteness amused me.

" Thanks for being understanding. Finished presentation. Totally shattered, so signing off, but I've got your number, so I'll call you."

Wow Hoo lucky, lucky me - something to look forward to ? I think not!

I'm not alone in the manless desert though, our resident office sex bomb BS chimed

"This has been my worst drought since I was 14!", At least I'm in esteemed company!

E-mail seems to be the weapon of choice for emotional outbursts also. This fabulous eruption was frantically tapped out and sent by a colleague, who finding her chair had been misappropriated, shared her venom with us all, under the aptly titled subject of 'Stealing Chairs'

AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!

Whoever keeps stealing my chair - which is super low so that my laptop screen is eye level and I don't end up squinting even more than I already do and becoming a total hunchback - STOP IT!

And no, getting a monitor won't help because at the moment I have to choose whether I want to use my laptop or write on old school paper as the bank of desks I sit at, is half the depth of every other desk and there isn't space for both, so no space for a monitor. And stealing another person's chair is just passing the problem somewhere else. Also all the other spare chairs won't lower !

Also, fyi, there is an entire stationary department in the building They have pens. Tonnes of them in lots of difference colours, so stop stealing mine !

I don't even care that this e mail is petty and ridiculous. I've had enough !!

Maybe there was something in the water, because prior to that funny e-rant, I erupted on finding out my new work desk buddy is none other than Super Dad.

SD is the type of parent, who believes that every waking moment of their child's existence should be recorded, as if failing to do so is somehow some offence against nature and anyone who happens to be alive. I swear if his kid so much as burps in a 'special' way, he whips his camera out faster than you can say pocket money !

When he didn't sit beside me, whenever the I-phone was pulled out with some new pics for universal admiration, complimented by an overly rambling story about said child, I would always slip away, returning to my desk only when I was completely sure that his tome was finished.

Don't get me wrong - I love children and part of my search for Mr OK (he's been demoted from Mr Right Now, because let's be honest, my calibre of suitor recently has been pretty pants!), is that I do want to be a wife and mother. I know it sounds completely ridiculous, but a Diva can dream can't she ?

But that doesn't mean to say I want to have the life of someone who already done it (smug marrieds, people who have suddenly become parents after trying for ages and then never stop banging on about their kids, sometimes unbelievably patronisingly so - "You're time will come"!, along with a pitying head lean which makes you feels like shit!)

It is way beyond annoying and just like the email,I'm not taking it lying down. I'm moving desks - tomorrow. There are some tortures which are too much to bear and this is one of them !

WTF !

One of the best things about Twitter, Facebook and of course blogs, is that when you are feeling super ranty, you can just pound away on your keyboard and tell anyone who's bothered, just how hacked off you are.

I have just spent the last hour twittering with an angry mob over of all things the X-Factor. Gamu and Tracey, two brilliant vocalists were let go, while Cher (who had a meltdown during her final performance) and Katie (who forgot her words and had to start again), got the big yes and now go on to perform in the live shows.

In the past it would been a water cooler moment at work, but the wonderful worldof twitter allowed me to rant to my hearts content. I was already feeling ranty, especially after O's Happy Sunday message this morning.

Yes this is the very same O, who had been so dismissive about TF, today he showed that he actually had a little more in common with TF, then he initially may have thought. As you know we were supposed to hang out today. That was until this popped up in my inbox this morning - is it just me or is calling a person going out of fashion!

"Hi BB hope you've had a good weekend so far.

Look, really really sorry to be a flake & cancel today, but not going to be able to make it. I've got a presentation to give on the Trust away day on Tues morning.I'm well behind and the panic is setting in!

Gonna have to bite the bullet and just work through today. Apologies, was aiming to have it done & dusted by yesterday.

I'll call you. X "

It's lucky I'm not a a neurotic or lacking in confidence,or disappointed - down playing a potential date is now second nature to me.

Fine it was a crap rainy day, but really O if you couldn't be bothered to meet or and this is giving you the benefit of the doubt, if you really had to work, you could at least been man enough to make a call.

Don't worry I'm not losing it,I'm just wondering when my crap man luck is going to end?

Next and Cheater's Progress

Next...is O, who wanted to know how I got on with TF. He could bearly contain his joy at hearing FT had struck out, but seeing my face, pulled back just in time to save the situation by saying we should go out instead and reassuring me that he would show up!

O is a massage therapist - 6ft, shaved head, built and....arr....well I'm not getting too excited, but if you go on a date with zero expectations, anything beyond that is a bonus right?

While I'm sort of on a green light,It seems like L's ex, Mr Man is stuck on a red. He just can't stand being dumped, instead of him being in his more familar role of doing the dumping. His room at Heartbreak Hotel, hasn't stopped him trying to turn on the charm so he can express checkout and move back into L's loving arms.

L hasn't wavered since she cancelled her subscription to being part of Mr Man's harem. She's changed the locks to her apartment, returned his belongings first class and politely asked him to continue on his permanent hike out of her life, including a blunt request that he stop calling her friends and family.

His response was deflecton - suggesting they meet to talk and also declaring,

"For what it's worth, I love you".

How ironic that despite 'loving' her, he still had absolutely no problem doing the dirty on her on multiple occasions !

Blown Out and Check Out My New Coat !

You know you are looking mighty fine, when not only your work colleagues tell you, you look great, but the hottest gay man in the office says you look fierce and classy. This was exactly how hot I was looking yesterday, when the Frenchman stood me up.

Long-standing readers of my musings, know that H has left me with a complete aversion for any man who can't be bothered to show up. It is just pain rude!

If you don't even have the balls to come up with a plausible excuse (H never did, bless him he was such a crap liar), then it is particularly galling.

In this instance, I texted TF to say I was running 10 mins late, due to my last meeting of the day over-running. When I got to the station, he had replied:

"Holy moly BB. I am myself stuck in a meeting with CEO and may have to cancel".

"May have to cancel" 5 minutes before the start of the proposed date, is in any serial daters' book really means 'I am cancelling', without actually saying it. Why some men do this, still remains one of life's great mysteries to me.

"What a shame. Let's save toing and froing and just raincheck. How about we try the weekend?" was my response.

Note I resonded positively, without a hinto of annoyance (life's too short!) leaving the ball firmly in his court. By the time, I got off at my station, my phone had still not bleeped.

Fortunately, my days of berating myself when dates or non-dates as this turned out, go tits up are long over. Where men are concerned nothing about their behaviour, on any level, surprises me anymore.

I did what any hard core fashionista does in the face of mild annoyance, I went shopping.

I returned three hours later to Casa BB with a gorgeous new grey wool winter coat, purple clutch bag and matching gloves - truly fabulous !

As for the TF - still no word - I have of course deleted his number from my phone.

NEXT !